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I might have operated him myself, provided better vascularisation, extended his life, decreased his misery a bit. I ll never know.He loved us the way he could, I guess we did the same too. But, but, but as long as I m alive, I wish we could have been better dad-son. Wish I was stupider. Wish I could enjoy TV along with him, or be there every day making life for him, or I was never born so he could spare the time he spent on me and did what he enjoyed most a more. I will never know.I have regrets, now that he is dead. I had them when he was alive. I think I tried to live his life for him. I backed out frequently allowing him freedom to chose, he didn't.Maybe that was his choice.My mom was a piece of art. I thought she was stupider. But she could listen. We told her everything. She had lots and lots of friends. Getting to a strange place, u'd expect her to make a few friends within minutes. People talked to her. She could have been a super therapist. Never did she tell them that she. His fellow carpooler was not impressed by the announcement. Only Greg, one of the four who shared a ride downtown, was left in the car with Jim. It was widely accepted that Jim had the worst car of the carpoolers. It was small, cheap, and old. Greg said, “You should trade this in and lease a new one. You can get a much better car for the same amount of money.”“I’m going to keep this one for another couple of years. A car is a way to get from point A to point B,” Jim said, “I don’t care what it looks like.”“You’re just cheap,” Greg said. He knew that Jim made good money, but you couldn’t tell it from how he lived.“Not really. I just have better things to do with my money,” Jim replied with a smile. He pulled over at the corner where a kid was holding out a bouquet of flowers trying to entice someone to buy. Fishing out a ten, Jim handed the kid the bill and accepted a bouquet of flowers in exchange. As usual, he told the kid to keep the change.“You could buy a much better car if you.
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